We Have To Have This Talk

I’ve asked my self several times in the past few weeks if anyone really cares about the thoughts, relevancy, and potential consequences of this blog’s main topic. As Christians, are we ready to ask the hard questions about masculinity and stereotypes OR are we afraid to share our stories and talk about the delusions and the destruction?

I honestly believe that we MUST talk about it. We must share our stories, admit our shortcomings, and seek the transforming answers that will eventually bring hope and health to a generation of hurting young men. The church needs us to assess what constitutes true Biblical masculinity and our children need us to think it through.

The facts are astounding. Official figures reveal that men are three times more likely than women to commit suicide and the numbers are increasing. There are several factors leading to this increase in suicide. There have been several societal changes over the last 50 years. One study stated that “men in mid-life have seen their jobs, relationships and identity, radically altered. There is a large gap between the reality of life and the masculine ideal.”[1] Older men and young men alike are attempting to find their place in the world. Carl Beech, director of Christian Vision for Men said that men “often have a particular resistance to expressing their feelings or asking for help – a false impression of what it means to be masculine.”[2]

Earlier this year, I shared a story about a school morning when several male students confided to me their hardships and fears. I began the post by mentioning a particular young man whose “bravado was extinguished by familial dysfunction and he couldn’t keep back the tears.” These young men were and are not being wimps or sissies. The correct answer to their struggles isn’t to “man up.” They feel trapped in a world of bullied masculine ideals and expectations.

Yes, we do need a revival of men of conviction, strength, vision, and courage BUT we will not change a thing if we hide behind our own masks of togetherness and toughness. We have to have this talk.

“The most common form of despair is not being who you are.”
Soren Kierkegaard

[1] Hodgekiss, Anna. “Men Are Now THREE times More Likely to Commit Suicide than Women.” Mail Online. Associated Newspapers, 19 Feb. 2014. Web. 04 Aug. 2014.

[2] “Idea Magazine July / August 2013.” Issuu. Evangelical Alliance, July-Aug. 2013. Web. 04 Aug. 2014.


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One thought on “We Have To Have This Talk

  1. I care about this. I care deeply about my brothers. I care very much that strength is only viewed as such if it is loud. I care that my brothers are being sold a false view of masculinity and told to conform to it. Christ’s strength was quiet. Christ wept. We’re all supposed to be like Him.